So I’m actually here, saying that I am now 7 WEEKS PREGNANT! It still hasn’t sunk in, I still don’t feel pregnant. However, I do have sore boobs, nausea, unbelievable tiredness/near on exhaustion & back pain! Literally no food sounds good to me, I feel sick if I don’t eat often which then makes it harder to choose something to eat! I am still having my progynova & my cyclogest, and will continue until I run out of my current supply.
I think the main thing I should say is that we had an ultrasound yesterday!!! I was a bag of nerves. I will admit I’ve had moments where I’ve burst out crying alone thinking ‘I don’t feel pregnant anymore I think baby hasn’t made it’ and I was so worried that we’d get in there and have the lady say there was no heartbeat. I was excited but dreading it too.
Turns out little pop is doing perfect! Measuring 9.5mm and has a lovely heartbeat we could see. She said that sometimes you can’t see anything at 6wks6days and even prepped us in case we had to come back next week for another scan….but we all saw this massive (but of course still tiny!) baby on the screen. Picture below 🙂 it shows the circular looking yolk sac on the right and the actual baba on the left that looks like a long blob haha!!
It was so magical. As soon as we saw the heartbeat Jon grabbed me with his hand and his eyes were something I’d never seen before. Seeing it there beating away perfectly made everything worth the wait. I am going to cherish every moment of pregnant & beyond, every kick, every movement, every scan.
I’ve now been discharged from our fertility clinic and will be a ‘regular’ NHS patient from now on. I have my booking in appointment with the midwife in the 20th October.
I am beyond excited, completely in shock at the fact this is happening and it is the most surreal experience ever. I’m desperate to buy baby&pregnancy related things but I’m trying to hold off until 12 weeks.
I will never forget the 6 year struggle & torment we have been through. Being told I’m fertile, then told I’m not, then told I am, then being told there is no chance of my getting pregnant with my own eggs. The endless amount of women & men who live day to day with the same kind of struggle is crazy. If I could find a magic wand and wave the luck we have had for this cycle over each and every one of you I would do so in an instant. No one knows how the struggle feels unless they have lived it themselves. They have no idea of the smiles we make when a close family member or friend announces a pregnancy, and all you want to do is burst out crying and run away. Although you’re happy, genuinely happy for these ladies a little more of your heart breaks inside & you can’t help but think ‘why not me’. They don’t see the endless amount of ovulation tests, pregnancy tests, basal temperatures charts, vitamins, the raw emotion you feel when your cycle starts again followed by the pick up where you say ‘this month is our month, we will do so much differently this month’. Then with IVF/ICSI the endless amount of needles, blood tests, self given injections, tablets, suppositories, scans, nervous phone calls to get updates on other progress of those little embryos&blastocysts, then the 2ww & the OTD. Infertility, explained or not, is something I would never wish on anyone. I give a virtual hug to anyone going through anything similar to what we have been through. You are all amazing men & women. So much stronger than you ever thought you were. Keep going because you deserve to fulfill your dreams more than anyone else I know xx
For anyone reading this who knows us personally we’d be really grateful if you don’t mention anything on social networking sites or tell anyone just yet. We’ll be waiting until our 12 weeks scan before making it official with friends & family!